Genie Wishes and New Year’s Resolutions

Sreaming of BIG THINGS and expecting them to happen are the central theme of this web site, but they should not be confused with rubbing a genie lamp with the expectation of granting your wishes immediately. No, you have to work for your success. And you will determine quickly that you will only sweat and toil for only those things you really care about. “Rubbing a genie lamp” is the equivalent of wishing for whatever trivial passing fancy that peels your banana.

You could say to yourself, “I wish I could play piano like that.” “I wish I had the million bucks to buy that mansion.” “I wish I could fly a plane.” “I wish I were the head of a big corporation.”

There are thousands of these kinds of wishes for every human on the planet. Some might be legitimate, but most are not. If you really, really wanted these wishes to come true, you would do something about it. You might even focus all your life’s energy in the direction of such an object. If you did, it would be a goal. If you don’t, it is just a genie wish. Unlike genie wishes, goals are meant for the hopes and dreams in life that you truly long for – real life changing or purpose fulfilling desires. Genie wishes are no different than my 4-year-old daughter’s oft repeated declarations of “I want that!” during toy commercials between cartoons. Those wishes have about as much value as the plastic used to make the toys.

And if genie wishes have as much life-fulfilling nutritional value as saccharine, then New Year’s resolutions are Nutrasweet.

Do not do New Year’s resolutions. There are no good New Year’s resolutions. Most end in failure because they are not carefully considered and likely have little purpose.

People force themselves into the hype of New Year’s resolutions as if January 1 is some special occasion on which to reset our personal clock or change our lives. Truth is, time is an abstract concept created by humans, and the Winter Solstice around which New Year’s occurs is as much a milestone in your personal chronology as, say, January 2, or April 27, or August 15. The day doesn’t matter. The act and your commitment to it are what are important.

New Year’s Resolutionists also often toss off their declarations as if they’re telling some subordinate what to do, lording over their “otherselves” as if they can bark orders and expect them to be done. “This year I resolve not to be so lardy. OK, Me, go unlard yourself. Well, get to it, fatty. Why aren’t you de-lardifying yourself?!”

Truth is, the only New Year’s resolution – the best New Year’s resolution – is the one that happens anytime of year when you truly, honestly “resolve” yourself – religiously commit yourself – to do something. You can’t just resolve to quit smoking because you know its bad for you; you have to desire to quit. You have to make – as described in the previous chapter – a decision. It has to have almost a “religious” value to you to give it meaning and purpose. Otherwise a New Year’s resolution is just another self-imposed obstacle that will lead to failure and disappointment.

Most importantly, most New Year’s resolutions lack everything necessary for a goal to be successful: value, strategy, specificity, measurability, and commitment